Good People of America:

What happened to America? Where is it, that America I imagined? I understand that the land mass is still here, holding up real estate and people, but was I living in a fool's paradise ? I realize that other countries such as Canada and Mexico consider themselves Americans in that they live on the American continent, but you know what I mean unless you were born with a silver iPod in your mouth.

People in high and responsible places have said crazy things implying that if "we" don't behave ourselves, retirees won't get their social security checks on time, spank spank, and other things such as hitting the kill  switch for social security, eliminating the child labor laws so "we" can put children, those incredible leeches, into productive low-paying jobs, and possibly creating a class of  people who do not enjoy the benefit of law, which have been uttered and broadcast on television and radio by our elected and unelected officials.

Are "we", the people who are born, live, pay taxes, and die in America, such objects of ridicule and contempt that world leaders, most especially our own, think "we" are ludicrous? If so, I must sign up for clown school. If you are already an amateur clown, think about becoming a professional.

Clowns are usually scary to young children who have never seen one. Imagine the first time something resembling a human with grotesque features and coloring aggressively jumps up into your vision and honks a horn at you or makes some other surprising and loud noise to get your attention. Scary clowns make good subjects for horror movies, as you already know, so don't let world leaders clown around anymore.

The holidays are over, and bill paying is about to begin in earnest. The Xmas tree is thrown out in the compost, and all the gift wrap is in the dumpster. So what's next, you?

A lot of people feel despondent at post-holiday time. That means depressed, although it's not a politically correct term, I guess. There are many good ways to fight depression, but you probably will have to fight it. Ignoring it does not make it go away.

After reading about how to fight depression, you may still feel depressed. Remember, every cloud has a silver lining, and sometimes the lining is gold with esoteric symbols and messages from aliens, or maybe it's a sketch of the tetragrammeton in a triangle as seen in Marie Antoinette's chapel. If you're feeling not OK, remember, there are people crazier than you are, maybe. Probably me. That should cheer you up, as a starter.

When I feel down in the dumps, I think of extreme things to do which just aren't permitted or simply not practical. For instance, and try not to get addicted to this one, you know that seventy-two flavors of ice cream place? Yep, do it. Empty that penny bank, and go get one of each. Maybe you can haggle with the owner for a price break, because at 50 cents a scoop, you're still going to have to pay more than $35.00 plus tax. You could take a friend or two, or not (more ice cream for you).

Sometimes, I think it's the lack of sunshine in your life. I have, in the past, put on my bathing suit in January, smeared on lotion and donned sunglasses, and hopped into my home's bay window for a "day at the beach". It was a sad idea, but it worked. It is sometimes a problem for the neighbors and people could honk a lot as they drive by, so try to find a safe and private area to do this, maybe your car if it has a skylight and a fold-down seat.

I've included my own two examples because you should feel free to be creative, especially if other attempts have not worked.